What's Good for the Goose

A criticism of double standards:

So--please allow me to blow off some steam. An argument arose between a friend and I today, that really brought a lot of things to a head. Some harsh things were said, and while I do not regret the things that I said, I do regret the way that I went about saying them.

It has been brought to my attention that I love too hard and I care too much. By more than one person. I have been informed that I allow people to walk all over me, and I am beginning to see it. For example, in this particular argument, my friend and I had worked together on a project. I merely asked this person for the written copy of what we had done, because during the planning process, my computer was not working. I was informed that I was being unfair, and that they should not have had to do all of the work. As I recall, typing the written part of a group effort is not "doing all the work," as the partners had to contribute to the group to be able to have anything to type.

For years, this particular person has come to me when they needed something, and every time I have dropped what I was doing to offer help. And, yet, if I needed their help, in return, they were reluctant to acknowledge me, and in most cases refused to help. The issue that arose in this argument was not the fact that they refused to share their work with me. That's never been a problem for me--I can whip out a five page paper within a couple of hours and a few cups of coffee. I haven't maintained a 3.89 GPA in college by expecting others to do my work.

The true issue is the way that I was treated. That I have been treated upon multiple occasions. Whenever somebody is willing to go out of their way to help you, you should offer them the same courtesy. Whenever somebody is willing to devote more time to you than you are willing to devote to them, then you should correct that. You never know when you'll need that web of support backing you one day, but because of the way you've treated them they'll be gone.

I truly have no hard feelings over my argument today--and even apologized. Their current status will inform you that they have not forgiven me, and probably won't for a while. And that's okay--I will chose to be the bigger person in this situation. I apologized for a situation that escalated quickly, got out of hand fast, and could have been avoided with a little bit of courtesy from both parties.

This being said, I urge you all to try harder to make time for anybody that needs your help, or to show appreciation to those who have helped you relentlessly in the past. One day, you will lose that help, otherwise, and then you'll grow to see what you truly had.